A lot of you have asked us about Tess (Rylin's Birthmom) and I realized that I haven't updated much about she or her family recently. Because open adoption is a new concept to a lot of people, and all parties in our situation are pretty transparent, I feel like we have an obligation to share some of our story whenever we can. We do feel truly blessed to have been matched with a birthfamily that is so much like ourselves when it comes to honesty and openness, and we know that it is no coincidence.
We continue to have a great relationship with Tess and usually text or message one another on a weekly basis. Because we live so close, she has been able to visit several times a month and continues to be surprised by how much Rylin has grown and changed. We laugh about how he has her lips and his birthfather's pointy head! Sometimes she brings a few of her friends, and sometimes her Mom is with her. Rylin gets lots of attention (which he is beginning to love), and no shortage of kisses and photos. Tess is working and taking classes to finish her high school diploma and to get a few college credits. She is definitely a typical teenage girl who is very social with lots of friends.
I asked her today when she stopped by for a visit to give me an idea of her perspective of life after October. (Because that's what everyone really wants to know) She said that she knows her decision was the best she could make considering the circumstances. She has days where she misses him and feels the true loss of parenting, but she says she is confident in her choice. She said that getting to see him has helped a lot. We both mutually agree that our relationship is better than we could have imagined it would be and are thankful for that. She thinks about Rylin all the time, and she has been keeping a journal since pregnancy that she plans to give him when he is older. We listen to a CD that she made special for him and gave to us after he was born.
My hope for Rylin (and I know Tess's too) is that he always feel wanted and loved...and I think we're off to a pretty good start!